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OLDER LIFEGUARD GUY

Vehicle: '89 Ford Probe
Dress: Shorts 'n Whistle, flip flops always
Housing: With younger brother and younger brother's girlfriend
Friends: Hangs out with lesbians
Nicknames: Hambone, Wyatt Earp


This Cool Guy is cool because he never stopped being cool, even after going to college for 7 years. He never graduated, but it doesn’t matter becasue he pulls down 24 G’s a year doin part time at two different pools.

The key to this look is David Hasselhof. You don’t need abs when you have a great smile and a whistle. People respect authority, and you must not be afraid to shell it out. And it doesn’t hurt to insist that the babes at the pool need a little ‘mouth-to-mouth’ every once in a while.

This cool guy also has a boat - but it is in Florida, and even though he doesn’t really have a boat, it still sounds really, really cool.